We are moving from one mindset or system of thought to a new one. I find it intriguing and exciting—what about you?

When you are aligned and in step with the current context—the reality of today—then you adjust your approach and style accordingly. Forbes selected the following characteristics to describe the 2013 “Thirty Under Thirty.”Stop and think: Would others use these words to describe you?

• Disrupter?
• Impatient
• Change the world?
• Entrepreneur?
• Creative?
• intellectual best?
• Surprising?
• Engaging?
• Fascinating?
• Hard-working?

If you answered, “yes” only to “hard working,” you need to adjust your brand and style. You may be thinking, “But my job, my role doesn’t require  me to be disruptive. In fact, being patient and thoughtful has been key to my  success.” That was then. It is time to add some new arrows to your quiver and  show yourself to be thoughtful and innovative.

No one is suggesting that you develop a whole new personality so even your best friends no longer recognize you. As always, authenticity is key and  your personal brand must also emanate the vitality, interest, and dynamism appropriate to your company culture and role. You may have less to adjust  than you think: given your success to date you can be sure that no one thinks  of you as flat, static or boring. Still, it is up to you to adjust your knowledge  and brand to the times.

What is important is that you see the whole. Some people see disruption; others anticipate transformation. This view reflects the differences between  “content out” and “context in.” If you view the context as the world—the earth—the processes are an eco-system. To see the whole requires a change in conversation and a change in mindset.

Have you adapted your mindset?  If not, what are you waiting for! 

FROM CHAPTER 12 Have I adjusted my thinking to the new requirements of leadership

A: Unlike previous Inaugurations, my colleagues are scheduling meetings smack in the middle of the event. I won’t even be able to take a sneak peak. I feel that I am missing out on an historic event. What do you think?

B: Yes, you will miss out on an historic event especially if you do not DVR it. I prefer to watch the event in real time and it seems that you might feel the same. There is something special—even sacred—when we pause as a nation to witness the peaceful transfer of power, which shouldn’t be minimized as just another political event. It is an important moment in our history and heralds the strength of our Constitutional framework.

With your colleagues, you may want to consider how you can begin to change the tone and mood in your office without becoming embroiled in an agree/disagree or for/against political dialogue. Here are a few questions to engage in:

• What is your vision/hope for 2017?
• What are the specific agencies or legislative agendas that are likely to effect my organization? My community? My family?
• Have we adjusted and aligned our approach, goals and metrics to capitalize on the changed environment?
• What new opportunities can we create?
• How will I stay current? How can we stay current as a team or organization?

Please avoid focusing on your differences and, above all, don’t stop talking and interacting with people who you think have a different view. Be curious, listen and take the time to enlarge your worldview by seeing the other person’s perspective. Remember: you don’t have to change who you are to appreciate what others are saying. OK?

Q: It seems that my get up and go has “got up and went!” Unfortunately, I just can’t seem to get started this year. Help!

A: Several of my clients have voiced the same issue and when I listen closely it seems that their inaction or slow start is the product of a general malaise. I choose the word malaise deliberately because it means a general discomfort—being ill at ease. No wonder, given the current unknowns of 2017. Almost all the media outlets and pundits agree that we have more information and unknowns coming at us this year than ever before. My comments are not politically motivated—we are experiencing the effect of accelerated cultural changes and information overload.   It’s impossible to keep up.

Listen carefully to the messages in the launch meetings that your senior managers are holding. Ask questions and think about how your firm’s 2017 vision, values and metrics apply to your role and your goals for this year. Get grounded.

Now, step back and get curious about the swirl of local and global changes and their effect on you. Consider these important questions:

• What are the key headlines or issues that capture your attention?
• What is your reaction: Confusion? Avoidance? Engagement?
• How are you making meaning of what is happening?
• What about the stuff that “just doesn’t fit” or align with your ethics, experience or values?
• What is your typical response to the change? Do you need time to think? Need more information?

I wonder,

• What is your mood: Are you optimistic? Depressed? Angry? Hopeful? Fearful? Confused?
• What are your expectations for 2017? Is your glass half-full or half-empty?

Remember that you have an important choice to make right now. You can get started!   You will notice that when you are moving—in action­ and going in a direction of your choice—that your whole mood will change. Move from malaise to mindful actions. Get going and you will change your mood and raise your energy. Here is a tip that always works: SMILE. Your smile will trigger good feelings in you and in all you meet: the whole world will smile with you. Re-energize: Listen to Dean Martin.

Make January your month!

If your list of New Year resolutions are already a bit wobbly please don’t set yourself up for failure. My advice, don’tmake resolutions pick a word.

I begin the New Year by carefully choosing a word and “living into it” every day. I start and end each day noting that my word has been expressed or realized.  My word for 2017 was expansive. I ask myself:  What can I do that I will expand my personal and professional boundaries? Last year was filled with a sweeping array of unexpected experiences, professional breakthroughs and (of course) adventures.  Here are a few highlights.

• MOS♀NYC Behind-the-scenes tours of the MET, the Natural History Museum, the Whitney, the Studio Museum of Harlem, then all sorts of extraordinary gastronomic treats. My fellow Museum of Science board members and overseers stayed at the legendary Carlyle Hotel; I stood on the stage of the Metropolitan Opera before the performance of Carmen!  
• Mayor Walsh appointed me a Trustee of the Boston Public Library, one of our most treasured institutions. In my quest to learn as much as possible about the BPL the staff is ushering me through its historical footpath. 
• I joined the alumni chapter of the New England Patriot Cheerleaders, then performed with my “225 cheer sisters” during the August 31 reunion in Foxboro where we performed at the pre-game show for Patriots v. Giants.
• Visited the Nixon Library with my White House Fellows Alumni colleagues. Broadened my perspective immensely about this brilliant thinker and flawed human being. 
• Chair of the “Women Who Make A Difference” committee for the International Women’s Forum We selected sculptor Carole Feuerman; Ilya Marotta, EVP & President of Engineering for the Panama Canal; and Lia Grimanis, founder “Up With Women,” an organization focused on breaking the cycle of poverty and homelessness.  Outstanding! I was then asked to announce the awardees and facilitate a panel discussion at the IWF Houston Conference. 1000 international women gathered and, later that evening, Hillary Rodham Clinton stood in the same spot on the same stage to be inducted into the IWF Hall of Fame.
• Passed my scuba refresher course with flying colors at dive resort in Taveuni, Fiji so that I could explore Rainbow Reef—one of the most amazing dive sites in the world. The corals were magnificent especially the “cabbage patch” 
• I stepped out of my box and took on a fundraising role at the invitation of the Museum of African American History Board Chair Cathy Stone and Executive Director Marita Rivero. Why? I believe that activism is called for now more than ever. So, with my co-chair Colette Phillips we lead the successful fundraising efforts for the 50^th Anniversary of Gala where we honored “Living Legends” Dr. Tony Coles and Dr.  Sara Lawrence Lightfoot.  A great time was had by all.

I have to pinch myself when I look back at the year.  No doubt, that I have been expanded by these transformative experiences of which I‘ve shared only a few.  Now it is your turn, begin each day with your word—for example, if your word is gratitude consider the following:

• How will I express my gratitude and appreciation in meetings, social situations, and the other places I find myself?
• Am I aware of the quality of my life?  Am I grateful? 
• Am I responding with grace and gratitude in difficult situations?
• What are the ways that I am demonstrating my gratitude to clients, colleagues, and friends and my family?

My word for 2018 is ease!  I wonder where it will take me, and who I will be by year-end.
What word will you choose?  Please let me know. 

Love is patient, love is kind.

It does not envy, it does not boast, it is not proud.

It is not rude, it is not self-seeking, it is not easily angered, it keeps no record of wrongs.

Love does not delight in evil but rejoices with the truth.

It always protects, always trusts, always hopes, always perseveres.

Love never fails.

1 Corinthians 13:4–8a

Wishing you all the best in 2017.  Fill it with joy, happiness and meaning.  

Love,

Priscilla

You have figured out by now that formal authority is overrated as a tool for getting things done. You may direct a team reporting to you, but don’t over-use this authoritative approach. Let’s face it, you can only delegate and direct a portion of your work. The way to succeed in organizational life is through cooperating and collaborating with others. Your ability to influence is what really extends your reach.

Influence is the tool that enables you to take advantage of your access. As you move up or laterally in your organization your ability to influence will be the key to your success. Through your influence, you can frame important issues your way, win support for your projects and ideas, and contribute to important decisions. Are you taking advantage of the sphere of influence your new role affords? Your influence depends on several key qualities, abilities, or knowledge bases, all of which you can develop further:

1 Your ability to analyze a situation quickly and accurately in a way that others are able to understand and make actionable

2 Your ability to assess the strategic impact or direction in measurable terms that others are able to understand and make actionable

3 Your credibility based on your record of success and accomplishments

4 Your access to the markets, to sources of information, to key clients and other sources of value.

You will derive the maximum benefit from your new role if you adeptly leverage your new access and influence to mobilize people and resources to meet and exceed organizational metrics.

From Chapter 8, page 67

Q.  I am no Grinch, but I hate holiday parties. I don’t know why. If I don’t go to the office party will it hurt my career?

A: Bah Humbug, to you! Even the Grinch changed his view of Christmas and celebrations and you can too. Ask yourself the following:

• Do you like the people with whom you work? Do they like you? If yes, make a plan to meet up.
• Is there a medical reason that is exacerbated by crowds or gatherings? Claustrophobia? Poor hearing? Migraines? Speech impediment? Or, painful back/feet? If yes, be honest and recognize that it is not the holiday party that is turning you into a Scrooge, OK?
• Do you have family or financial challenges that make the holidays stressful? If yes, shift your focus from what you don’t have to what you do

Or,

• Are you “failing” at work or do you have one foot out the door? If yes, your career prospects may already be in jeopardy.

Take the time to answer these questions. If you determine that you don’t want to attend the party because your career is on the line, now is the time to talk to your manager so that you have a clear understanding of where you stand and what you need to do. Don’t wait! Clear the decks so that you can enjoy your holiday.

Remember, ’tis the season of sensitive feelings, old hurts and failed expectations. The holidays can be stressful. However, you have a choice–don’t pull the bed sheets over your head like Ebenezer Scrooge tried to do in the Holiday movie classic.  Seek clarity and have the conversations that will allow you to enjoy the holidays–especially the parties.

When your cultural norms are different from the mainstream, or your upbringing hasn’t prepared you to march in step with the dominant group, it may seem that your choices are limited: either blend in or step out. With strong cultural traditions of your own, you may feel you can’t or don’t want to emulate the majority. But it is possible to hold on to the best of yourself while succeeding.

My client Mercedes was viewed as hard working but shy. Her cultural background did not prepare her to feel comfortable contradicting her manager— she hadn’t learned how to be assertive without feeling or appearing aggressive. Her manager knew that Mercedes wanted to succeed and recommended her for a leadership development program sponsored by the firm’s diversity council. In addition to classroom instruction with personal assessment and individual coaching, this program included a unique interface with senior management: over breakfast or lunch, senior leaders shared their stories how they arrived in their positions and of what they learned along the way. Mercedes said:

These sessions really opened my eyes. As I got to know the senior leaders, I discovered that while they share a set of consistent values, they employ very different leadership styles. Through the coaching, I was able to role-play different ways to respond to situations until I developed a style that worked and felt authentic to me.

Mercedes learned that it is not necessary to abandon your own culture or “blend in” to succeed. There are many successful leadership styles, and you can discover one that will work for you. It may help to ask successful people who are “like you” how they “made it.” The important thing is to find ways to display your abilities.

And if you want to express you cultural identity. I recommend that you handle your preferences for styles of dress, levels of formality, and other more visible manifestations of cultural differences with sensitivity. You don’t need to abandon your own practices, but don’t over display your differentness either. Be sure your dress, carriage, and voice make it clear you are ready to do business. After all, you want the conversation to be about your competence, not your culture.

Here is a quotation from W.Edwards Deming:

We are all different from one another, but in the important things we are all alike.

From Getting There Staying There Chapter 6. p 47

Q:   Over the last year I thought I was having open and direct conversations with my colleague, but now I find that we are on opposite sides. I am shocked! How can I ever trust this person?

A: Now is the perfect time to examine how open and direct your communication style really is. You might ask:

• How much time am I talking?
• How much time do I listen?
• Am I listening to confirm what I already know or am I listening to learn something new?
• Do I catch myself waiting for my turn to talk? Note: If you are waiting for your turn to talk, it is like a double fault in tennis: (1) you are not open and (2) you are probably not listening.

Continuing the tennis metaphor, it’s helpful to view conversations as a tennis match: Hit the ball over the net and wait for the ball to return. Conversations should be a well-timed give and take, back and forth. And with that framework in mind, consider your conversations with your colleague: You hit the ball over the net by expressing your support for Hillary Clinton for president, correct? And it seems that you didn’t wait for your colleague to return the ball. Imagine that you kept throwing your own ball up into the air and hitting it across the net — crazy, huh?

Well, it appears that, with regard to the 2016 election, you were not alone. Indeed the world now recognizes that they, too, missed seeing and hearing an important cultural wave and conversation. How did this happen? Two answers:

1. Most people simply don’t listen, and
2. We don’t allow people who have different views a “safe space” to air them.

This summer I started telling my friends that Donald Trump would be the likely winner of the election. I wasn’t advocating a position; I was sharing my observation [Note that I voted for HRC]. And, their response was “No, no, no, that is not possible,” vs. “Why, what makes you say that?”   If you are wondering how I knew, the answer is that I listened to what friends, colleagues and passersby were saying and by listening I created a space for people with various points of views to express them.

Remember: The quickest way to build trust is to listen.