Q. I am shocked. My best friend is in ICU. I can’t stay focused on work—honestly, I can’t pay attention to anything. How can I get through this?
A: My heart goes out to you and may your friend have a full recovery. I can appreciate the initial shock of seeing your previously healthy friend now in a hospital bed. The situation is likely to be more unsettling because of the urgency and unfamiliarity of the ICU. Now that you have seen your friend in this condition and in this environment, make certain that you have the basic questions answered:
- Is your friend receiving the quality of care and attention needed to address their situation?
- Are you in communication with your friend’s immediate family? If yes, the health updates may be comforting
- How often do you visit? How long do you stay? Remember that patients in the ICU need to rest. You may find this website with visitation tips helpful.
It is only natural to be distracted from your everyday routine, but your goal is to incorporate your friend’s health challenge into your routine. In other words, shift from being shocked to understanding and maybe even accepting the situation. Now turn your attention to work:
- Do I need to re-schedule appointments? Change project deadlines? Note: Take a close look at your appointments to ensure that you can keep your commitments.
- What can I take off my plate?
- What is the time of day that I lose focus?
Don’t waste time trying to ignore your thoughts or beat yourself up because you are distracted. Take a walk. Grab a coffee or tea. And remember that this probably isn’t the first time that an unexpected event or situation made it difficult to focus. I suspect that you are forgetting how resilient you are. Give yourself credit. Be patient and kind to yourself and to your friend.