Q: I am interviewing for a new opportunity and don’t want to make the same mistakes that I made in my previous firm. Yes, I will own up that I am a bit bull-headed when it comes to taking advice. How can I keep from making the same mistakes?
A. Being aware that you are “bull-headed” and don’t listen to offered advice is an important first step to avoid a mishap. However, the answer isn’t “listen and follow the advice.” You have years of being told to listen, and you have ignored advice and suffered the consequences. To set out on a new behavioral path you need to have skin in the game: a reason to do something different. The choice is up to you.
Consider the following:
- What are the winning traits that you will bring to your new job? What will you keep in the closet?
- Who will “call you” if you lapse in behavior or hold you accountable? Colleague? Spouse/Partner? Coach?
- What are the circumstances or “triggers” that bring out the “bull-headed” behavior? Note: Keep a log with specific details to increase your understanding of the circumstances so that you can take steps to break the habit.
- Are you just hoping things will be different, or are you willing to change?
Note: I am not too proud to admit that I can be a jerk at times and when I am it’s up to me
to stop being a jerk. I am not only aware of the path that I am on I know from previous experience the outcome. To right myself, I turn to Proverbs 16:18: Pride goes before destruction, and a haughty spirit before a fall.