Question: The office outing is next week and families are invited: How can I—we— get out of going?
Answer: If your experience of outings is limited to family picnics you probably didn’t grow up in the country club social set. As a result, you may be missing not only the etiquette of responding but also how to behave once you are there.
Turning down an office outing can be risky business, especially when it is a visible event: not only the senior leaders, but also your colleagues are “taking attendance.”
I wonder:
- What expectations did you accept with your manager—formally or informally—about social gatherings when you joined the firm?
- If LGBT, is your concern about the comfort level of your partner and children? If the answer is yes, what conversations do you need to have to align your personal and
professional life? - And, here is the “tough question”: Why don’t you want to attend? If the answer is “I don’t like those people,” start revising your resume.
Breaking from my Q&A format, here are a few ways to ensure that your behavior is appropriate:
- Eat before you attend the event—don’t arrived famished and make a rush for the food!
- Do your homework and have your “casual” elevator speech ready when you meet senior leaders.
- Ensure that your spouse/partner is prepared and knows the names of your manager and colleagues.
- If bringing children, make it a fun event for them.
- And, always remember that this is a “work” event.
