Question: Everyone comes to me for help and advice, but my boss tells me that I am mothering my team. It’s my nature, but now I think that it is holding me back. What should I do?
Answer: There is a big difference between mothering your team and smothering their opportunity to be responsible and accountable. Remember the delicate balance your own mom exhibited to give you freedom to try new things, knowing that you could get hurt or fail. A good mom stands on the sidelines cheering, but she doesn’t jump into the game. Your role as a manager is to create a safe environment where your team can take risks, learn from them and grow.
Now to your boss’s remarks. To stop mothering, consider the following:
- Are you micromanaging your team?
- Are you making excuses for their lack of performance or inconsistent performance?
- Are you defensive? Protective?
- Who is doing the work?
- Are you delegating appropriately?
- What is your relationship with your manager?
Follow this link to the Financial Times article entitled: Why we see bosses as parents.
Note: If nurturing is your nature be yourself. Find your authentic expression. Your boss, team and colleagues will appreciate your compassion, willingness to listen and the time you spend guiding their development.